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Lost Virginity but couldn t perform

Lost Virginity but couldn t perform

I still cant get this out of my mind because it really bothers me that I couldn't sexually perform well on the very day that I lost my virginity.
Plus I feel like I want to tell some of my family but it would partly destroy some of them and some of my image.

I don't know how to present this in a butter-you-up way, but after failing time and time again in getting my life together, the stigma, scorn and turmoil of being a 30+ years old virgin was getting to me.


Yesterday, I was presented an opportunity to have sex with a woman for the first time in my life ever!
Only issue was that she was part of an existing open-relationship.
[Prior to these past 2 years, I only wanted to have sex with a monogomous heterosexual natal female that was close to my age.]
Given my track record of passing up on opportunity after opportunity in my life, I figured the situation isn't ideal but is doable.
I ended up doing 4 things against my family's moral upbringing.

If I was much younger, I would have passed on that opportunity.

~~ The real Kicker is that my erection was too weak ~~
I feel more ashamed that I couldn't penetration capable erection for most of the night.
I failed to perform well because a multitude of factors were against me such as exhaustion, poor diet, lack of fitness, the anxiety of the moment, the awkwardness of the situation, a tight condom, and inability to satisfy my partner because of lack of skill in sex.

I couldn't please her or myself!
She was super tight (vaginismus?), she was somewhat dry (her period?), I was erection deficient, and the plus the condom was numbing most of the pleasure.

~~ What this boils down to ~~
I really wish I could meet another woman inside of a better fitness situation so that I can flush that out of my mind since I was a super disappointment to her.
However I really need to change my diet, exercise, and find a condom that fits right and won't hinder my blood flow.

Yes it bothers me a little that I ended up participating in a train threesome with a non-married open relationship woman while her cuck partner watched and recorded some of it.

I know I can NOT tell my close family about this.
It stands against their moral fiber and telling them would either shock, disappoint, anger, or phase them in a manner I cant imagine.
anonymous Relationships July 12, 2018 at 6:23 am 0
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3 Rant Comments
sounds like my first time, but I couldn't stay hard cause I was crazy drunk. First times seem to always suck. It gets better
anonymous 2 years ago
Thanks for the support.
anonymous 2 years ago
I have same experience meet this girl from tinder she ends up coming over to my place we did foreplay but then she had to leave 2-3 days later we meet up to have sex. And yeah once I got the condom on I kept losing my boner didn’t even get to lose my virginity felt really ashamed. To make matters worse she didn’t want anything to do with me after that mainly cause I ignored her when she called me mainly cause I was so ashamed. So then a YEAR goes by and I start hanging out with this other girl she’s kinda fast but that’s fine. We end up going to a party and getting pretty drunk so we’re in the back seat of my car and she sticks her ass up in the air and I’m about to put it in then. All of these emotions and shit start getting to me and I’m so nervous I can’t find where to stick it in then poff lost my erection game over the girl was already pretty drunk also. But she thought we actually had sex☹️ I told her yeah we didn’t have sex cause you were too drunk and I didn’t want you to be completely wasted. Needless to say because of that lie I told me and her didn’t work out and yeah I’m still a virgin but throught all this I know the problem isn’t my penis it’s my mind, diet, my health. Be honest with your partner
Mike 1 month ago
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